Eat your candy like a big ol' baby
The most natural way of satisfying your oral fixation is to suck your own thumb. However, when you do that, there may be quality problems. How sanitary is your thumb? What does it taste like today? Why is it wrinkly like a thumb raisin? Our Mandarin orange-flavored, 2-1/2" tall, thumb-shaped sucker solves all those problems and more. Remember, candy is a perfectly acceptable way for you to publicly act out your secret shame without being teased.