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Shakespearean Insult Bandages
$5.00Add Elizabethan insult to injury
- 15 3" x 1" latex-free bandages
- Come in a collectible tin
- Decorated with Shakespeare & his insults
- Perfect for curs & wretches
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Wall Monsters Vinyl Decals
$12.00I guess they could also be ceiling monsters
- 8 vinyl removable decals
- 4 large 11" & 4 small 5-1/2"
- Snazzes up any room
- Jerks hate them
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Jane Austen Bandages
$5.00From Pride and Prejudice to Bandages and Boo-boos
- 15 bandages with image & quotes
- Includes a dashing reusable tin
- Bandages are latex-free
- FREE PRIZE INSIDE!
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Abraham Lincoln Bandages
$5.00He will heal your wound as he healed a nation
- Twenty 3" x 3/4" bandages with Abraham Lincoln
- Come in a reusable tin
- Bandages are latex free
- FREE PRIZE INSIDE!
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Affirmation Bandages
$5.00Turn your boo boo into a yay yay
- Twenty 3" x 3/4" bandages with affirmations
- Come in a reusable tin
- Bandages are latex free
- FREE PRIZE INSIDE!
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Snake Oil Soap
$5.95Contains real snake oil, which doesn't really do anything
- A 2.5 oz. bar of soap
- Contains real cobra oil
- Allegedly helpful for something, but not really
- Clean your skin with snake
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Snail Oil Beauty Soap
$5.95Has real snail oil in it, no really, snail
- A 2.5 oz. bar of soap
- Contains real snail oil
- Allegedly helpful for something, but not really
- Clean your skin with snail
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Bigfoot Air Freshener
$2.00Smells way better than the actual bigfoot
- Air freshener that smells like pine
- It's 5" long & made of thick paper
- Includes string for hanging
- Real bigfoot smells like cheese, socks & mildew
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Bacon Scented Spray Freshener
$7.57Hey handsome, you smell like a butcher
- Spray smells subtly of maple bacon
- Pump sprayer
- Do not wear to dog park
- No more BO, just BLT!
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Let's Get Messy Emergency BBQ Pig Out Kit
$4.50You can't eat good BBQ without making a mess
- Contains 2 moist towelletes and 2 bibs so you can share
- Comes in easily transportable collectible tin
- Decorated with Slicey the Pig
- Be prepared, sometimes BBQ sneaks up on you
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Dear Leader Frugal Toothpaste Extrusion Device
$2.95Even though he has passed, Kim Jung Il wants you to conserve toothpaste
- Hard plastic lips with slit for tube
- Lips are 3-5/8" x 1-5/8"
- We're not sure how Kim Jung Un feels about toothpaste
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Bathroom Eraser Set
$4.00The most adorable bathroom accessories ever
- Set of 5 bathroom accessory erasers
- Range in size from 2-1/4" to 3/4"
- You'll make more mistakes as an excuse to use them
- Cute
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Underpants Bandages
$5.00Keep your pain private with ouchie underpants
- Twelve 2-1/2" x 1-1/4" underpants-shaped bandages
- Come in a reusable tin
- Latex free with sterile gauze
- FREE PRIZE INSIDE! No more naked wounds
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Tissue Noir
$3.50This tissue is as black as as your mood before coffee
- These tissues are blacker than black
- Cardboard box with 50 two-ply tissues
- Perfect gift for sad goths
- How ninjas blow their noses
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Macho Tissues
$4.05Awww, you just stick with your wussy tissues, you wimp
- Cardboard box with 100 tissues
- Not tiny, wussy tissues, these are 13" x 7-3/4"
- Tissue real men prefer
- Perfect for blood & sweat, but never tears
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Cupcake Toothpicks
$2.50Tasty baked goods meet oral hygiene
- Filled with vanilla-flavored toothpicks
- Easily transportable 3" x 1-1/4" x 1/2" tin
- Look tough, while thinking about cupcakes
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Hand Soap
$8.03Wash your hands with your hand
- Hand-shaped piece of soap
- 4-3/4" long and musk scented
- Hilarious visual pun
- Great reminder to wash your hands before returning to work
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French Fry Lip Balm
$2.95Your lips are as shiny as the floor next to the deep fryer
- 2-1/2" tube of lip balm
- Tastes like french fries
- Like kissing a 5 Guys
- Twist bottom dispenser
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Macaroni & Cheese Bandages
$5.00Coat your wound with starchy goodness
- Twelve 3" x 1" bandages decorated with mac & cheese
- Come in a reusable tin
- Latex free with sterile gauze
- FREE PRIZE INSIDE!
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Public Toilet Survival Kit
$5.03Helps you survive filthy bathrooms
- Includes a toilet seat cover, 2 antiseptic wipes and a pair of gloves
- Comes in a 3-3/4" tin
- Slips into bags and purses in case of emergency
- Tested at a filling station in rural Alabama
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