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You will be forgiven if your first thought when you read the headline was that Archie McPhee was going to start making glasses for monkeys, it totally sounds like something we would do. But in this case, Monkey Goggles refers to a website.
Think of it as a literary magazine whose sole sponsor is Archie McPhee. It's going to be articles about things we love, great stories, humor, news and an occasional editorial opinion. We launched it on Monday, but haven't really announced it anywhere to give us a chance to get our sea legs.
Right now, we're still figuring out what belongs and what doesn't, but here are a few highlights:
UPS sent us this helpful map of places our packages might be in danger from pirates. We would like to offer two helpful suggestions from the perspective of a company that has had some success with pirates. One, instead of "high risk areas for piracy" on the legend, it should say, "HERE BE PIRATES." Two, they should have put an "X" on the map to show where UPS has buried their treasure.
One thing they did get right is that it was delivered by a fellow with a black spot on his hand that died soon after giving it to us.
Click picture for larger view.
The first decision you have to make when you throw a mustache party is whether you are going to draw the mustaches on or go for the more realistic stick-on fake mustaches. If you do decide to draw them on remember the most important warning, DO NOT USE PERMANENT MARKER!
If you decide to go with stick-on mustaches, there are five types to choose from. For the guest of honor, we recommend the Jumbo Handlebar Mustache. This is the most impressive fake mustache we have ever seen and will give him or her the feeling of being the master of mustaches.
Next, there is the Bendable Party Mustache. These cost a bit more than the rank and file fake mustache, but they are totally posable. You can have a completely different look every time you turn around. You can go from dapper to dreamy with a simple adjustment.
The final three varieties are all simple patches of fuzz with adhesive on the back. These are the ones to give out to special, but not that special party folk. We recommend a mix of all three types. Our most popular is the Stylish Mustaches, which contains seven styles of varying colors. Or go with the pre-packaged Mustache Party in a tin. If you have some ladies that are uncomfortable with wearing a mustache, we suggest our Stylish Mustaches for Girls which feature seven different styles in a pretty shade of pink that shouts, "This is a lady-stache and I’m proud of it!"
Another thing you can do is make mustache cookies. If you don't have a cookie cutter shaped like angel wings, you can buy a mustache cutter here. (Link is to another company) Don't underestimate the appeal of mustache-shaped food like shoestring french fries, Cheetos and limp asparagus. Also, it's fun to serve cream-based drinks at the party like White Russians or Eggnog as these are the most likely drinks to add even more milk-mustachey goodness to the party.
As for party favors, check out our mustache category, but if you want to spend a bit more for a unique hand-crafted item, go to Etsy and search for mustache.
And finally, make sure you play some games like mustachioed celebrity charades or Pin the Mustache on 70s Burt Reynolds (Our gift to you. Click here for printable PDF).