Archie McPhee

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Awesome Stuff

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  1. Gravy Candy

    Gravy Candy

    $5.95

    Instock

    • Candy that tastes like gravy
    • Comes in a 3-1/4" x 2-1/2" x 2" tin
    • You get 2.5 oz. of candy
    • Does not come with mashed potato candy
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  2. Lucky Skull Porcelain Teapot Pouring

    Lucky Skull Porcelain Teapot

    $24.95

    Instock

    • Porcelain teapot shaped like a sugar skull
    • Holds 20 oz. of tea
    • 5-1/4" tall
    • Delightfully morbid
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  3. Runaway Monkey Air Freshener

    Runaway Monkey Air Freshener

    $2.00

    Instock

    • Air freshener inspired by popular internet monkey
    • Smells like lingonberry
    • 4-1/4" tall with string for hanging
    • Pay homage to primate rebellion
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  4. Atheist Stocking

    Atheist Stocking

    $12.00

    Instock

    • 16" long felt stocking
    • Decorated with evolution & the Big Bang
    • Won't be filled by Santa
    • Helps everyone be included
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  5. Inflatable Evil Unicorn Horn for Cats on a Kitten

    Inflatable Evil Unicorn Horn for Cats

    $5.00

    Instock

    • 5-1/2" long, made of vinyl
    • Four-point elastic strap system
    • Black as your cat's soul
    • Evil cats love it!
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  6. Pirate Stocking Cap

    Pirate Stocking Cap

    $6.95

    Instock

    • Soft black acrylic
    • Fits most adult heads
    • Fearsome skull and crossbones symbol
    • "Archie McPhee" logo says you're in our crew
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  7. Wall Monsters Vinyl Decals

    Wall Monsters Vinyl Decals

    $12.00

    Instock

    • 8 vinyl removable decals
    • 4 large 11" & 4 small 5-1/2"
    • Snazzes up any room
    • Jerks hate them
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  8. Creepy Horse Man Dashboard Wiggler

    Creepy Horse Man Dashboard Wiggler

    $7.50

    Instock

    • Nodding figure of a businessman in a horse mask
    • 6" tall, made of vinyl
    • Loves to stare
    • Completely beyond explanation
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  9. Lab Flask Shot Glass

    Lab Flask Shot Glass

    $12.00

    Instock

    • One flask-shaped shot glass
    • 2-3/4" tall
    • Holds 2 oz. of fluid
    • It's hip to be square
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  10. Savory Bacon Sticks

    Savory Bacon Sticks

    $3.00

    Instock

    • Bacon-flavored snack sticks
    • Look like pocky sticks
    • Yummy!
    • Free temporary tattoo
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  11. Ear Buddies Ear Buds

    Ear Buddies Ear Buds

    $12.95

    Instock

    • Working ear buds
    • You'll have tiny ears on your ears
    • Works with iPhone or any 3.5 mm jack
    • Both funny ha-ha and funny peculiar
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  12. Giant Glow in the Dark Googly Eyes

    Giant Glow in the Dark Googly Eyes

    $7.50

    Instock

    • 7" wide with easy-peel adhesive back
    • Glows in the dark after exposure to light
    • Like a watchful nightlight on your fridge
    • Cast a ghostly pallor over your kitchen
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  13. Anime Eyes Sleep Mask

    Anime Eyes Sleep Mask

    $4.53

    Instock

    • Comfy polyester mask & cotton back
    • Wake up bright-eyed, no matter what
    • Look like an anime character
    • Fits most adult heads
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  14. Doctor Who in Your Pocket

    Doctor Who in Your Pocket

    $12.50

    Out of stock

    • 3-1/2" key chain, battery included
    • 6 Doctor Who soundbites
    • Almost like being a Time Lord
    • Perfect for the key to your TARDIS
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    Out of stock

  15. Inflatable Cthulhu Beard

    Inflatable Cthulhu Beard

    $7.50

    Instock

    • Lightweight vinyl inflatable beard
    • Fits most adult faces (9-1/2" long)
    • Elastic bands loop over ears
    • Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
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  16. Jumbo Bacon Candy Cane

    Jumbo Bacon Candy Cane

    $5.00

    Instock

    • 10-1/4" tall candy cane
    • Tastes like bacon
    • Festive symbol of bacon supremacy
    • Not to be used to club baby seals
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  17. Santa Dreidel

    Santa Dreidel

    $4.50

    Instock

    • Reflects Jewish & Christian traditions
    • 2-3/4" tall wooden, four-sided dreidel
    • Covered with Christmas symbols
    • Charmingly misguided
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  18. The Avenging Narwhal

    The Avenging Narwhal

    $7.50

    Instock

    • One narwhal with impalable penguin
    • 5-1/2" long & made of hard vinyl
    • Detachable tusk
    • 1-1/2" tall evil penguin included
    • Read More
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  19. Lucky Yodelling Christmas Pickle Ornament

    Lucky Yodelling Christmas Pickle Ornament

    $12.00

    Instock

    • 4-1/2" tall plastic pickle ornament
    • Has loop on top for hanging
    • Equipped with motion detector that unleashes a yodel
    • Batteries included; has on/off switch
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  20. Krampus Sweater

    Krampus Sweater

    $42.50

    Out of stock

    • 2013 EDITION!
    • Horribly distasteful Christmas sweater
    • One size that fits no one well
    • The anti-Santa will punish the naughty
    • Limited quantity SOLD OUT!
    • Read More
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    Out of stock

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